You’ve probably heard of catfishing, or using a fake identity to trick someone into a relationship. But there’s another phenomenon you should pay attention to in the dating world, and it could be a threat to both your money and your heart.
“Financial catfishing” is when someone fakes their wealth to impress a date or partner. Like traditional catfishing, it can take a significant emotional toll.
While a slight exaggeration may seem harmless, financial catfishing can easily lead to loss of trust, difficult relationships, strained marriages, and even divorce or financial ruin. Learn more about financial catfishing, common signs, and how to protect yourself from financial and emotional harm.
Financial catfishing is similar to traditional catfishing, but with a financial angle: it involves misrepresenting your wealth in an effort to deceive another person. The goal of financial catfishing may be to impress, deceive, or even scam a romantic partner.
In today’s dating world, your financial reputation carries weight. According to a Credit One Bank survey, more than half of millennials and Generation Z say a good credit score makes someone more attractive. Additionally, 20% of respondents would like dating profiles to include people’s credit scores and financial habits.
That growing interest in a potential partner’s financial situation can influence how people want to appear. When financial responsibility is considered attractive and even worthy of a dating profile, some people may feel the need to exaggerate or falsify their financial reality.
Read more: 4 Common Financial Mistakes Couples Make That Lead to Divorce (and How to Avoid Them)
In a world of featured videos and curated feeds, faking appearances is easier and more common than ever. The Credit One Bank survey found that more than half of respondents have faked wealth or success at some point.
And it’s not just words: 37% of respondents say they would be willing to go into debt or overdraw a bank account to impress someone, and 38% have actually done it.
Financial catfishing can range from minor exaggeration to major deception. But if left unchecked, it can have serious consequences:
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Loss of trust: Lies about money can often lead to larger patterns of dishonesty. For example, lying about your expenses can lead to piles of hidden debt and a breakdown of trust between partners.
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Financial consequences: Financial catfishing can lead to real financial complications. Hidden purchases, falsified income, and spending to keep up with appearances can lead to overdrafts, credit problems, and piles of debt. And if you and your partner merge your finances (through co-signed loans, shared mortgages, or joint bank accounts), the consequences can affect both people even after the relationship ends.
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Emotional toll: Financial infidelity can also have emotional impacts. Anxiety, stress, resentment, shame, and even financial helplessness are real possibilities when your partner isn’t transparent about money.
Read more: Should unmarried couples have joint bank accounts?
If you’re in a relationship or in the dating pool, keep an eye out for signs of financial fishing. While it is possible to mask financial realities, the following behaviors may be red flags you need to spot someone before they get hurt:
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Lying: Although it may be difficult to detect, a romantic partner’s lies should raise alarm bells, especially when it comes to finances. Keep your eyes and ears open for when things don’t seem to add up. For example, someone who claims to be financially stable but always asks for money may be keeping you in the dark.
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Generous spending: Unrestrained spending can be a major problem, even for the wealthy. If your date seems to spend to show off his wealth, take a closer look. Often, those who are financially well off have achieved their success through moderation, not excess.
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Avoid talking about money: Not everyone loves to talk about money and that is normal when it comes to a taboo topic. But if your date or partner takes this to the extreme, be careful. Hiding finances and refusing to share personal details (such as employment status, for example) could be signs of financial fishing or infidelity.
As common as financial catfishing is, there are ways to protect yourself and your money when dating or entering a new relationship. Here are some tips to help you:
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Be careful what you share: Don’t share bank accounts, credit cards, or login information with anyone before you’ve earned their complete trust. Likewise, be careful when signing a loan. Damaged credit or an empty bank account can take a long time to recover.
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Take note of the inconsistencies: Everyone makes mistakes sometimes, but when the inconsistencies start to pile up, pay attention. Lies, omissions, or mismatches between what someone says and what their financials show could be signs of potential catfishing.
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Be direct: Be proactive in financial conversations in your relationships. Having these conversations early can bring clarity to each of your financial situations. And if they don’t, it may indicate that something is not right.
Read more: 8 financial questions to ask your partner before considering getting married